Breaking Through
Someone posed a question the other day, and it made me reflect on how far I have come. They asked for advice on how to move on from a bad breakup.
Years ago, I was lost, confused, had low self esteem, didn’t know an ounce of my self worth, but I wanted to be loved. So I put up with things that are down right embarrassing looking back. But, everything works together for our good. What seemed like the end of my world at the time I’m able to look back now as if it was a breeze. I was able to give advice on the journey I took from then to now, to which a stranger I shared it with was very grateful. She asked me had I ever shared it and the answer was no, except with a few people who asked.
It made me think of how many of us go through a bad break up and stumble through. So in hopes that my mistakes will help you minimize yours and the recovery time, here’s a few tips I learned along the way.
- Get rid of all distractions: and when I say all, I mean ALL! Unfollow all social media, unfollow friends that were only connections through him, don’t go certain places if you can help it, don’t look him up. Block him if you have to. Make it easy on yourself to stay focused.
- Forgive him: let it go! Completely. He is who he showed himself as. And it’s ok. That’s for him to deal with and grow up. Thanks be to God you wasted not one more day. Holding on to what they did only weighs you down. So truly forgive and let go.
- Forgive yourself: this one took me by surprise. I had no idea I was burdening myself until I realized how much I blamed me for the time lost and the blatant signs missed. I called myself stupid I don’t know how many times. But I’m not stupid, and neither are you. The only way to go from here is up. So grow from it and apply the lessons you didn’t before.
- Pray and spend time with God: this is where my relationship with God took place. I was really making the relationship my Jesus and source of joy. But that’s not a way to live. I learned to realize the ways that God viewed me and started to see how I truly did deserve so much more. And yes, what I truly desire is out there for me.
- Learn to love yourself: what do you like? Do it. Sing, dance, take yourself out. Go on vacation, have a staycation. Treat yourself, buy yourself something. Show the person you’re meant for how to treat you by the way you treat yourself.
have you overcame a bad breakup recently or in years past?
What did you do to overcome and be truly free?
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